Friday, June 8, 2012


Gatinna. have you got ESP or what? I wear my Sands blue bracelet and my massage therapist asked me why I was wearing it. She had read my book so she understood when I tried to explain.

 Yesterday, A pair of New Zealand parents, Jane and Martin Weekes had to bury 3. A school mate much younger than me buried his wife.

In this little grave lies a loved child at Okahu Bay. The parents must have chosen this to represent themselves. It is heart breaking to have to bury your child. I know, I did this 22 years ago.

This is a very old Chinese Grave found next the Sarawak Museum in Kuching. You don't find many of these big graves today especially in land scarced Singapore and Hongkong. In these two countries, the dead are exhumed to make way for the living.

These graves are called armchairs, It looks like a sofa seat. It is the chair of a very important official of the king's court. It is commonly believed that when a man is alive, he may be lowly peasant, but when he dies he can still be an official of the king. Therefore, no expense is spared to build the grave.

The other reason is the Chinese used to ( they still do) worship their ancestors, and pray to them to look after them and bless them. My Grandfather used to tell us, when a disaster had been avoided, it is because our ancestors have been seated high up, so he could see afar and take care of us. The dead doesn't sleep, so he is sitted in the arm chair. if he was sleeping, he couldn't be taking care of us. A good grave site is high up the slopes of the hills where he could see far far away.


Susan Demeter said...

These are beautifully haunting images, especially the first of the parents. I cannot imagine the loss of a child. My research interests occasionally bring me into contact with the bereaved. When appropriate I will recommend your book. (((hugs)))

eastcoastlife said...


The greatest fear of parents is for their child to die before them. I cannot fully understand nor feel your pain but I image it is horribly painful.

I am glad you have found the strength to continue with your life and to help those in need of consolation and support.

Ginny Hartzler said...

I think you have posted one of these armchair graves before, long ago. Such a sad weekend...

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